A selfish knitter.

Is exactly how I describe myself! It doesn't sound good at all, does it?

I was chatting with some very good friends of ours on the weekend about starting small businesses, particularly online businesses. I have harboured a long-term goal for myself that eventually I would be well-practiced enough to be able to spin and dye yarns that are appropriate to be sold. The fact that I have one small child and one on the way hasn't interrupted this idea too much, it's mostly a thought that I will spend the best part of the next five to ten years building my skills and buying better equipment so that I will be able to devote enough time to this harebrained scheme and have it pay off as a legitimate career venture.

I've always felt very strongly that if you do something that you love as a career, you will never view it as 'work', or as something that you 'have to do'. However, this idea had a bit of a shake up on the weekend when Pete suggested that I could knit and sell the knitted items, particularly babies and children's clothes.

I thought about that and found that I just had to respond, saying "No, I don't think I could at this stage". I don't knit super-fast right now, and don't have huge, huge tracts of knit-time and so as I said to Pete, "When would I knit for me?" ('me' meaning me, my family and close friends - I'm not that selfish!).

And so, as much as I'm really looking forward to unleashing my peculiar talents on the world (and expecting them to pay, of course!)... for now, I'm incredibly grateful for any time I get to craft for me and my loved ones. Every stitch is an effort, a step towards a completed project (whether a jumper or a washcloth) that says "I made this for you".

Even if that 'you' is really 'me'.

I want it yesterday!

I'm an impatient person. Combine this with the fact that I fall in love easily, and I fall hard - well, I can suffer tremendously from a dangerous affliction, usually seen in Western society; I want it all, and I want it now. I think the technical term is "consumerism", but here's the thing - I don't want merely to have these things (actually, not just material posessions; it's experiences and ways of being, too) for a temporary time, merely to dispose of them when they are no longer as fashionable - crikey, I don't do fashion in any sense of the word - I usually want these things because they are a piece of the life I want to be leading, or the person I want to be.

I see the handspun yarns advertised in 'Creative Knitting'; they're so beautiful, absolutely delicious-looking, but if you were to ask me, I couldn't even tell you immediately what I'd knit from this skein of $35 luxury cashmere or four-ply. But I'll see it, see the time, and skill, and patience that went into spinning and dyeing it, and that's what I want. Instantly.

I see the yarns that Stephanie Pearl-McPhee describes knitting with, and I feel 'desperate' to have them, to knit as she's knitting - I want to be able to make and own something as beautiful as that. But time and money are, as always, issues for us all. And if I were to own it, right now? It would either join the queue in the stash cupboard, or it would bump another project back in the line.

I am currently planning a vegetable garden. My aim is for my family to be a little more self-sufficient, and I want for us to be eating better produce, whose origin I can be certain of. I even went so far as to actually plan, then revise and plan again so I wouldn't go off half-cocked (like so many half-built IKEA purchases squirreled in cupboards around our house - but that's not for here). I researched. I called different landscape garden suppliers. I read books and internet articles. I talked it through with my Mum. I ordered heirloom seeds from the huge, huge range available from The Digger's Club at their exceptional prices, instead of more expensive seedlings from the limited range at some nurseries. I reduced costs (and built enviro-cred) by finding old pine posts and concrete pavers at Mum and Dad's to recycle for garden edging.

And yet, just as I am on the cusp of putting the whole lot together, while I am still on school holidays and so have time available to do this... Money has become an issue. Plus, I'm inconveniencing Pete and Wonderboy for at least a couple of days, having to drag them around and force participation (we need to borrow a trailer to pick up aforementioned posts, pavers and some hay and lucerne bales, plus a trailer load of garden mix - heavy lifting is smarter done in teams!).

I just feel like I get so close to achieving a goal, to find it's just beyond my reach, or totally swept out from under me. I do enjoy and totally love the process of creating the garment, the yarn, or the garden, but something inside me has set off a wee alarm clock - much like a biological clock, but this one's telling me I'm going to run out of time to achieve all the things I want to do, learn, see and experience. Excellence in spinning and dyeing? Tick-tock. Speed, accuracy and creativity in knitting? Tick-tock. Improving and maintaining our home and garden?

Time's running out, and Money is covering Time's back as he makes his getaway in a stolen car.


And then I read back over all that, and realise what a selfish being I can be. I have a beautiful son who, admittedly, allows me to fit some knitting, spinning and gardening into his busy schedule. I have a wonderful husband who tolerates m going on and on and on about these same subjects. I live in a nice home, and have a garden to work in and improve. I have my health, my eyesight and full use of limbs.

I'm doing pretty damn well, and push myself to think some Pollyanna thoughts (glad thoughts, or thanks-giving, I suppose). I think of people out there who are grateful just to be able to procure some seeds and a meagre patch of dirt with which to grow vegetables - and these may be all their family have to live on. People who would and could knit twine on a couple of bush sticks, had arthritis not taken their once dexterous hands.

This will hopefully serve to remind me of how lucky I am to be who and where I am. Things that come to us without effort sometimes weren't worth having in the first place.

... and then she wore it!

I did, I really did - I got my lovely Linen Print top all finished, blocked and stitched up in time for me to wear to my Year Twelve ten-year reunion. Okay, not to the proper reunion; I wore it to the gathering the night before, held at The Oaks in Neutral Bay. Here's a shot of the finished product:

The making up was a bit wonky, I'm still not quite as proficient as I could be at this part of the whole process. I don't have a great deal of confidence in my handsewing abilities and so I sew, and oversew, and then around the arm seams, I sew it over once more just for good measure. I don't want this bugger to fall apart, or even need repair. Ever. If it needs repair, this will suggest that I didn't sew it together well enough in the first place.

I blocked and pressed the pieces last Thursday night, and took it with me to Mum and Dad's place on Friday afternoon, and started piecing it together, with Mum keeping half an eye out on me so I didn't make any major cock-ups. By the time I'd left to go home (at about 10.30pm, mind you) I had sewed the top of one sleeve on. I stayed up till past midnight, getting the top of the second sleeve on. I had a really good reason for this, and I'm sure anyone reading this will find me certifiably mad for even planning this... I wanted to be able to keep sewing this together in the car, and I thought if I set it up so there are no detached pieces, this will make it easier.

I like to make life hard for myself, I really do.

And so, in the 33 degree heat that was last Saturday, in among packing and organising my family to go to Sydney for the weekend (which takes a lot. Don't let anyone tell you that packing for a small human must be, logically, easier and quicker than packing for a fully-grown human) I found myself stitching together the pieces of jumper that was to be my attire for that evening. I finished it within minutes of arriving at our hotel, and this was within minutes of needing to be dressed and hurrying down Military Road to the pub to meet up with my classmates. Ooh, I like to live on the edge, me.

The best part of the evening (apart from wowing people with my talent for making my own clothes - not. Strangely, I think people take a bit of a view of pity on those of us who enjoy knitting our own garments. Something along the lines of "That's so clever of you? Yeah - I buy my clothes!" he he. Nah, I know there wasn't any pity praise. It's just the way that non-knitters look at the whole labour of love). Where was I? The best part of the evening, apart from my putting away scary amounts of wine, which while fun at the time, bit me squarely in the arse the next morning. At 5.30am. When Wonderboy decided to get up.

Aack. Back to the point. The point! The best part of my evening was when I, nervous, dressed and ready to go, crouched down in front of Wonderboy to say goodbye. My beautiful, beautiful little 19-month-old boy reached up and held my ears and said "Pitty". I asked, "You think Mummy's pretty?" And my darling looked at my face, and said "Pitty Mummy. Ear!"

I have the most beautiful ears in the world. Wonderboy said so.

It was the drugs, I swear!

I finished the second arm of my Linen Print top today, and I have to say, I am SO PROUD. This is the shortest time I have ever taken to knit an adult top, and this was one with a reasonably complex stitch pattern (for me, anyway - I know, I'm still learning!), plus I even made sure to be careful and thorough about the whole thing, undoing and redoing mistakes. I feel I am on my way to becoming A Knitter.

Back to me finishing the second arm. I was coming up to the end of the straight part of the arm, and absolutely motoring along, and making my increases on each end, every sixteen rows and marking it on the photocopy of my pattern faithfully. After awhile, I found myself thinking, "I could have sworn I finished the other arm faster than this", but my little markings told me I still had five out of the last sixteen rows to complete...

Now, the next ten minutes were a bit of a blur, I have to say. I just remember feeling like someone had slapped me on the forehead and next thing I know, there's a puddle of Rowan Linen Print noodles around my ankles. I had completed an extra fourteen rows thinking I still had a pair of increases to make, when in reality I had done enough rows to have completed all the necessary decreases for the set-in sleeves and cast off! I still maintain it's the meds I'm on to shake this head cold that made me do it... Hey, I think it's the meds I have to thank for making me knit like a maniac!

So, I am proud to say, I rethreaded the needles, completed the last fourteen or so rows, and got on with sewing in the edges. Hopefully in the next day or so I can get it all sewn up in time to wear to my Year 12 ten-year reunion; an event I'm nervous and excited about at the same time...

...I still can't believe I've finished a top for myself in two months - I'm so proud!

Urrghh...

Feeling... so... sick...

Taking such exemplary care of Pete this last week has taken its toll, and now I reign supreme in the 'Fortress of Germs' as I refer to our house. Pete, God bless him, has taken on care of me beautifully, and spent today running around for me as I lay in repose on the lounge. Unfortunately, this means I'm not doing much else, including knitting. And that makes me so sad.

Here's a stash picture to keep me going: I've got some baby knitting to do for a dear dear friend who's currently overseas and expecting her first little one. As it's a surprise, I won't detail the pattern here, but I will in my Ravelry pages.








And, speaking of little ones, here's my little one - he's been practicing smiling lately, with all his teeth. Even when we've been crook, it's still such a pleasure looking after Wonderboy!

I'm trying!

Funny, I've only done a few of the 'Five Senses Sunday' posts and I've had enough already! I might make it a once-in-a-while thing, to make sure that I only post when I have something of interest to add photos to.

In other news, my dear darling husband has been crook as a dog this last week, and Wonderboy developed a nasty cough that's been really stuffing his sleep around, after he had his Chickenpox (Varicella) immunisation last week. So, I've had sole responsibility for the household - never have I been so grateful for our new car!!! At least I've been able to get Wonderboy out of the house to go to Mum and Dad's, to the park, and the do grocery shopping. Pete's been able to have time to rest without Wonderboy poking him in the face, saying "Dadda ni-nor" (Daddy's sleeping, isn't he, Mum?)...

I'm really happy with this current knitting project - the linen print is knitting divinely, and I have to say, this is my first project in which I feel I can start calling myself a Knitter (with a capital K, as opposed to knitter with a lowercase k). The Yarn Harlot describes the difference in 'Knitting Rules!' - I'm pretty certain that's the book, but (and I apologise to the Harlot for my slack arse here) I am just so, so tired that I cannot be bothered looking up the direct quote. Sad, isn't it? I can't help it - knitting has won out these days...

I feel like I've got the confidence to rip back and redo now, rather than tilting my head to one side as I look at a little mistake and saying "Aw, no-one will notice", even though everytime I put on that item, I think "That's that spot where I stuffed up the ribbing". And, I've decided, now is the time to Knit like a Grown-Up. Heaven forbid this means I act like a grown up - that's never going to happen! All this means is that when I cock-up, I stop, I think and I go back and fix the problem, even if this means making an effort!

I've now cast off the front, and cast on a sleeve - I feel like I'm flying on this one! This would have to be the fastest I've knit a top for myself!

Check out my gorgeous, gorgeous rose as it has opened this week. This is the very first bloom from my own, brand-new rose garden I planted in the winter. This is from a variety called 'Fragrant Delight'...

Quit Jivin' me, Turkey!

Some knitting quotes for today. The first one's mine, I just said it to Pete, as I explained how I would need to rip back three rows on the front of the linen print (I got too enthusiastic as my decreases were continually correct, and I totally forgot to change colours!):

"That's why I like doing the backs first; that way most of my cock-ups are behind me... literally"

I have spent this morning looking after my sick and miserable-looking husband, as he sits balled-up and shivering on the lounge in his Holden flannelette pyjamas (he has a temperature - I'm not freezing him in some wacked-out, 'old wives tale' cure!), and doing the grocery shopping with Wonderboy. This is a new thing for us so far, as we've only had the new car a few days. I'm sure the novelty of "I'll take Wonderboy shopping, you stay at home" will wear off pretty soon.

Once Wonderboy went down for his afternoon nap, I crashed out on the lounge, grabbed the computer, and started up the latest "Cast On" podcast. A new thing for me, "Cast On" is the brainchild of Brenda Dayne, a native Oregonian who has been living, writing and knitting in Wales for the past five years. She has such a lovely, soothing voice, and I find her podcasts so interesting to listen to, usually as I knit. I'm having a bit of trouble connecting with other knitters in my local area (though Ravelry in helping with this!), and so I rely on knitters blogs from all over the place, and "Cast On" to really help reinforce my sense of being a part of this community of these lovely and often strange individuals called Knitters.

Interestingly, Brenda's subject for this most recent podcast was "I speak Jive". This is a quote from the movie 'Flying High', where an old lady offered to translate the 'jive' a bloke was speaking to the air hostess.

What has all this to do with knitting, you ask?

Brenda says:

“In linguistics, a ‘language death’ is a process that occurs when there are no longer speakers of a given language. This can happen in a variety of ways… this process happens slowly, when the older generation cease to transmit the language to younger generations, with the result being fewer and fewer people who speak the language…”

She refers to a book called ‘Traditional Country Craftsmen’, about the tools and languages of mostly forgotten crafts. The end of the book discusses textile crafts, and she was amazed to find that the familiar tools and methods of spinners and weavers had ended up the same way as those of ‘thatchers’, ‘cloggers’ and ‘chair bodgers’ - crafts long ago faded into obscurity.

She continues:

“Several years ago, I knit a sweater called ‘the red edge’ from the book ‘Poems of Colour’. I haven’t worn it in a couple of winters, because the button band was knit - a bit funky... I stopped wearing the sweater that for all of the things I have knit over the years, this was the one thing of which I am most proud…

... On Sunday, I decided to fix the red edge… I had an extra skein in the main colour left over from this project, and so I didn’t bother reknitting the yarn, I just tossed it and started fresh… I also knit the bands a little wider, so they’d accommodate a zipper. the sweater looks great… I love it again, and I cannot wait for the zip to arrive so I can finish the project…

... I ordered an 18-inch, cream coloured open-ended zip, because I could not find one locally. This item cost 4.50, with shipping probably closer to 5. Convert that, to US and I have just paid 10 bucks for an 18 inch, cream coloured plastic zipper, because they are items of such rarity in this country that you must pay for them dearly... People used to sew in Britain. And not that long ago. How did this happen? When did people give it up, and why?

…The birth of industrial process may not have killed craft, but it surely hastened its demise. People stopped ‘bodging’, and ‘clogging’, and ‘thatching’, and sewing, and the language of the crafts dies with them. I don’t think this will happen to knitting, at least not in my lifetime, still I feel it’s usually best to hedge one’s bets. And that is why I speak jive.”

I love the way she linked that all together. Debbie Stoller speaks the same way in 'Stitch and Bitch', referring to engaging in crafts like knitting and crochet as not being anti-feminism, but pro-feminism. Preserving these crafts, these traditions, and not letting them fall by the wayside as we become more and more dependent on technology as a society is such a strong thing to be a part of, and really feels to be, I don't know, humanity-affirming to me. It kind of reminds me how I'm a tiny, tiny part of something bigger, and I love that feeling.

Wow, that was unexpected...

How funky.

Last post I told y'all how I was merely a gnat's wing (my husband would use the term 'a bee's d*ck' for that one) away from receiving my Ravelry invite, right?

The next day, I checked my placement again, thinking 'ooh, I'll update my progress along the list', and the message "You are 0 places away from receiving your Ravelry invite. We sent you an email invitation TODAY". How terribly exciting!

Hence my not posting for a few days - I've been crawling around Ravelry, exploring all the wee nooks and crannies and setting up my profile. It's taking some time, cause I want everything to look bee-yew-ti-ful. Of course I don't have enough to do on the internet yet, do I, between Facebook, Shoeboxes, Lifestory and now Ravelry. I love it!

Some pictures of a newly-finished throw rug, I think, to top this post off. I put pictures (ages ago) under "The not-quite-started and the not-quite-finished" of this throw being completed. I'm really happy with the way it blocked, cause it just wasn't lying flat. It's actually the first major lot of blocking I've done, and since I'm so happy with the result, I may make it a regular occurrence...

And, in other knitting news, my linen print top has a back part, completed last night! I am just so enjoying knitting this one. The linen blend is so lovely and soft, and I can't wait to wear it this summer, it looks like it's going to drape so nicely... Or maybe I've got a bit of wishful thinking going on here that somehow this top will hide any unsightly muffin-top. How is this going to work? The top is composed primarily of HOLES. Hmmm. Something for me to think about here. Ah, who cares. I still love this project.

To finish: a vase of lilacs that have started flowering in my backyard. We moved here at the end of last summer, and it's wonderful to watch how all the plants are waking up, and I can see all the different colours they've turned out to be...

Lovely stuff.

Five Senses Sunday (or 'Oh, the Humanity!')

I know this post is a couple of days late; I'm not going to make a habit of it. I've been up till 1am every night for the past three nights, and since Wonderboy hasn't yet reached that point in his little life where sleeping is a good choice, we've also been up each of those mornings at around 7am... But here's Five Senses Sunday, in all it's painful, post Grand Final glory...

The sight of people (most dressed ready to support the Manly Sea Eagles) pouring into the Olympic Stadium, geared up for a big Grand Final!












The sound of the wall of noise that 81,000 crazed football fans can make on kickoff (also the sound of over half those fans booing Michael Crocker after he pulled a late tackle on Brett Stewart and knocked him rotten, and chanting "Off! Off! Off! Off!")






I'd like to tell you all about the taste of a hot footy meat pie, but I never did end up having one! Maybe I can say the taste of bitter defeat...

The smell of new car interior... We managed to trade our good ol' Corolla in on the weekend, buying our first real 'Mum & Dad' car, a white 2006 Subaru Forester. Pete's picking it up tomorrow, and I'll post a photo then.

And now, just to make me feel better - the feel of my knitting. I haven't picked up the sticks much over the long weekend, but here's what I'm up to in my 'Ines' Rowan Linen print top:


And, in other news: I just checked on my wait list status on Ravelry, and I'm only 215 people away from being invited! I can't wait! Just goes to prove after this weekend's disappointments, there's always something good going on in life...

God, I love this hobby

Could I even begin to call this thing called knitting a hobby??

I reached one of those 'Knitting Nirvana' moments yesterday when I started my Rowan linen top. I haven't done much in the way of lace patterns in my knitting career (which, grant you, hasn't been terribly long either!), and so I find that I hold my breath for the first ten rows or so, praying to the Knitting Goddess that I've got it right - I'm not yet proficient enough to be able to 'read' all stitches as I go - and so, when that moment arrives when I end that row, spread the knitting flat across the needle and look back on my work...

It is... just... MAGIC when it all looks the way it should.

I can exhale, and as I do so, a smile creeps across my face and I take a few seconds just to pat myself on the back and say quietly "Hey, I can do this!"

And then I centre myself again, and remind myself that I need to keep focusing (one thing I am really learning with lace knitting is to bloody well focus on each step, each stitch of the pattern - carefully!) and I get back to what I'm doing.

This is just another of those moments that keep the enthusiasm up, that remind you just how worthwhile all the ripping back, dropped stitches and muttered swearwords are, in the end.

Avast, Me Hearties!

Today be International Talk Like A Pirate Day!

It was a great one. I didn't actually remember it was today till we started the morning at work, and to help settle a little boy who didn't want his dad to leave, and I suggested we make pirate hats...

And on we went. My goodness - it was fantastic. I growled and "Yaaarrghh"-ed in response to questions, made pirate hats and patches for everyone, and demanded that children follow instructions or they'd "walk the plank". We played 'heads, shoulders, knees and toes' with hooks instead of hands, saying "Ow!" each time we touched a body part... We read pirate stories, built a pirate ship from outdoor construction blocks and painted a big pirate mural. The children were stoked, and quickly started referring to each other as Cap'n, growled at each other and responded to requests with "Aye, aye!".

I've added a link to the official Talk Like A Pirate Day site in my list so you can check it out. There are also links, under 'Get Your Pirate Booty' so you can even Knit Like A Pirate! I'm personally quite taken with the pattern for "The Pirate Queen's Booty Bag"... I'll have to add it to the growing list of things to knit... ordinarily, when you see a growing list of things you should do, you start to feel overwhelmed and then a bit depressed, but with knitting, it's different. Every new project you see, every new yarn you fondle in the shops gets you more excited and enthused; it makes you want to crack on with your current projects so you can start another. What a great way to occupy time.

Ahoy there!

The not-quite-started and the not-quite-finished

Firstly, allow me some time for self-congratulation and a little back-patting. What you see in this first picture is a tension square (also known as gauge). Somewhat unremarkable, I know. But this is my very first tension square!!! I'll pause here for applause. Occasionally, I do knit by the rules, and I am determined to have my lovely Rowan 'Linen Print' knit up properly.

I loved the colours when I bought it (on sale, might I add!!); Very desert-like, stone and ochre colours. And then I wasn't sure as it was knitting up. I was wondering if it was too speckledy but then realised I must have been looking too carefully (you know how when you look at a word for too long, you could swear blind you spelled it incorrectly? A bit like that) and that I should move on.

And so, while I was waiting for my very special 'first tension square' to dry after I so carefully washed it (just like the Yarn Harlot told me to!), I went searching for something else to knit. I dug up this blanket that I started back when Pete and I started planning Wonderboy's grand entrance into the world...

My mother-in-law gave me several balls of thick cream handspun that she'd done ages and ages ago, and I had decided to use it as my first foray into circular needles, knitting something quite huge. Needless to say, I was bored stupid after the first two balls were knitted up. I did persevere, until I was down to the last ball and could stand no more. I cold-water dyed the last ball a cool greeny-yellow and thought I'd do a border. Then maths got the better of me; trying to work out how much I could use on each side, and I balled it up, shoved the lot into a calico bag and ignored it until now...

I'm nearly done, actually - but now that the linen print tension square is dry, I'm sort of "ooh.. this one? This one? Which one now?" Acck!

Spoilt for choice!

It's Five Senses Sunday!

Some things we're experiencing around our place on this Sunday...

The smell of sheets fresh on the bed after a day in the sunshine on the clothesline...









The taste of Club dark chocolate with peppermint filling... yum!













The feel of pedicured feet on freshly mown grass (many thanks to Mum, for the pedicure birthday present, and to Pete for mowing the lawn!)












The sight of exciting, brand-new balls of Rowan Linen Print, just waiting for me to get started on my summer top!











The sound of Wonderboy, laughing and saying "Mumma, Mumma!" while we rumble on the grass following watermelon for afternoon tea. What a legend!





Life is good.